Category: random

Body Map, part one

By , March 5, 2012 5:04 pm

This is part one of a writing exercise about body mapping. Stay tuned for part two.

My fingers are a gateway to the world. Typers of words, feelers of skin, players of keys, graspers of all that is in reach. They are long and neither slender or fat, but finger-sized. They have hair between the first and second knuckles, between where they connect to my hand and where they bend. The hair has been hit by lasers, plucked by tweezers, shaved by blades, but still it grows back. Less and less with hormones and lasers and frustration, but still it grows.

The thumb on my right hand is larger than that on my left. My gym teacher slammed it in a door when I was in third or fourth grade. It was an accident, and he apologized, but still told me to stop crying when I went to the nurse’s office. I needed stitches under the nail, one of the most painful experiences I’ve ever had.

When I hold my fingers up straight, palm out, the middle and ring fingers pop apart, as if in a permanent Vulcan greeting: Live long and prosper, forever. It’s kind of silly, and makes me incredibly self conscious. When I wave, I make sure to do so with fingers spread. When I hold my hand out, I either cup or spread my fingers to hide this physical quirk. It’s significantly more pronounced on my left hand, presumably because I broke those fingers flipping off my bike sophomore year of college. Ouch.

Continue reading 'Body Map, part one'»

Links for YOU

By , March 3, 2012 8:58 pm

Cleaning out some old links once again…

Dreaming of Dresses: Transgender Books for Children – Anyone read any of these? I enjoyed Luna, but don’t think I’ve read the others.

The 7 Most Baffling Things About Women’s Clothing –  Yes. Yes. One thousand times yes.

Requiem for a Dialogue – Lots of things, but particularly about femme and trans. A good read.

2012 Oscars and the Bechdel Test – Yes, I’m late. So sue me.

Why Mass Effect is the Most Important Science Fiction Universe of Our Generation – I’ve only played #1, so no spoilers please, but I did love it and this is an interesting article.

One Town’s War on Gay Teens – Great article from the Rolling Stone.

Trans* Self-Defense Workshop by SQS & CoH March 18th

By , March 1, 2012 8:32 pm

Looks so cool! I’ll be in Cali visiting family (and at a surgeon consult – eek!) but anyone in Chicago should check it out.

On behalf of SQS we are immeasurably pleased and excited to announce a joint event with the Center on Halsted called SEED: Self Education Empowerment and Defense. This wonderful workshop will take place in the John Baran Senior Center, at 5:30pm, on March 18th, 2012.

SEED is an empowering forty-five program designed for individuals of all ability, specifically for those who are trans*, queer, and/or female-identified. These communities are often the targets of physical and emotional harassment and violence. We will teach participants the skills to avoid these situations and stay safe and in control. A member from the Center’s Anti-Violence Project will speak about developing less violent and more affirming environments and relationships.

Our instructors are trans* identified individuals of color and this program will be offered in English and Spanish. Participants are encouraged to attend in comfortable clothes and be ready to transform! We are grateful for the opportunity to educate, empower, and advocate for these communities, which are too often underserved and underrepresented.

This workshop is free and open to all who wish to attend—allies included.

SQS is a fierce grassroots collective of trans* individuals and their allies from a variety of cultures, backgrounds, and experiences. We are here to serve as a force of strength and empowerment to all—and to connect individuals to community resources. Meeting in the Pilsen neighborhood of Chicago, we are dedicated to advocacy and celebrating the simple fact that we are who we are.

For more information, please contact Van Binfa at [email protected] Visit our web page at Please RSVP to June LaTrobe at [email protected] to ensure sufficient resources and materials.


By , January 24, 2012 10:42 am

Whaaaat? Rebecca is posting semi-regularly? I shall fall upon my fainting couch!

Oh hush.

These have been sitting in a draft for a while, so some are a bit dated.

Being the Visible Femme – Thoughts from Autostraddle on how to be a out, visible, lesbian femme.

How to be a fan of problematic things – Amazing! A must read for fans of Lord of the Rings, anything Robert Heinlein wrote, 99% of comics out there, Orson Scott Card, or anything else that is both awesome and really problematic. The comments are also well-worth a read.

A 13-year-old hits a slam-dunk on why slut shaming is wrong – If you have a bad taste in your mouth after Taylor and the Girl Scout transgender thing, WATCH THIS VIDEO! She’s my hero.

Stuff cis people say to trans people – Part of the “Stuff ____ people say to ____ people” trend, but still hilarious. “So what’s your real name?”

Finally, I’ll be in Indianapolis tomorrow and Thursday, performing at Butler University. More info is at their website. Hope you can check it out if you’re in the area. Let me know if you’ll be there!


Race identity

By , November 29, 2011 1:52 pm

Not the kind of race I mean

I was recently having a conversation with a number of artistic peers, discussing the impact of our personal and community histories on our art and artistic process. I don’t remember who the question was raised by, but the group consisted of a mix of racial/ethnic/gender/sexual identities, making for good conversation.

In general we all agreed that our various personal and community histories – of religion, race, ethnicity, language, geography, class, sexuality, gender, and so on and on and on and on – played a factor in how we approached creating art. While it was a great conversation, and fodder for more discussion, I’m less interested in that than in something which happened after.

During the conversation, I said, “It’s been interesting going from presenting as part of a strong, privileged group – white, heterosexual, male – to an oppressed group: queer, trans, female.  I try to both be conscious of and artistically honor that oppression while being aware of the privilege I still do posses.”

Then, while giving someone a ride home – who identifies as black, female, lesbian – she turned to me and said, “Your comment really surprised me, since I don’t think of you as white.”


Continue reading 'Race identity'»

Firing update, Chicagoland gender reassignment surgery

By , September 28, 2011 1:41 pm

First, an update on my firing from last October. I had filed a complaint with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, a federal agency who makes sure employers are being all equal and such. I just got a letter from them saying that, because Neal Math and Science Academy hadn’t responded to the EEOC’s inquiry, the EEOC would be investigating the complaint themselves.

I talked to my lawyer, who said this isn’t great news – that would be if Neal decided to cooperate with the EEOC from the beginning. But it does mean that the EEOC hasn’t forgotten about my complaint, and hasn’t (yet) said it’s not under their jurrisdiction.

In other news, my dad sent me a Chicago Tribune article about Dr Schechter, a plastic surgeon in the Chicago suburbs who does gender reassignment surgery. This is very interesting to me, since the only folks I’d found doing surgery were decidedly not in the Chicago area. At the same time, the fact that I haven’t heard of this guy makes me hesitant – all the doctors I’ve been researching are well-established, with reviews online over at this site. The article also says Schecther works with the Drs Etner, who I’m not fans of.

Has anyone heard anything about him? Positive or negative?

Check this out

By , September 24, 2011 11:53 am

Promoting for a friend, who just released an album. Check it out: and

Some catching up to do

By , September 23, 2011 2:28 pm

I’ve been away for a while. I admit it. I was in Kansas City, home, Indianapolis, home for Chicago Fringe, then was hit with a bad cold, and am now finally getting myself back on my feet. In the meantime, this blog has languished, with the longest spats of no updates in…well…its entire existence. I wanted to talk about why that gap exists, and what I’m up to now.

First, the gap in writing. I’ve come to love blogging, something that is honestly surprising to me. It’s cathartic, a great source for performance material, and has allowed me to engage in a worldwide online community. Blogging is also tiring. It requires, much like the performance work I do, a public display of emotion, of experience, of self. And while I was on the road, I was surprised to find it took a little too much out of me. In retrospect, perhaps it shouldn’t have been a surprise: Flyering, doing interviews, staying with strangers, then doing very personal shows followed by talkbacks, being ‘on’ all the time, it’s tiring. Lots of fun, too, but tiring. And so when I got home at the end of the day, to the house I was staying at or to hang out with the friends I’d made on the road, I was reluctant to crack open my laptop and deal with all that again online. Not that it was bad stuff; as I said, I had an amazing time touring No Gender Left Behind. I’m already looking at touring opportunities for the coming year. But it also took a lot out of me.

Continue reading 'Some catching up to do'»

A lesson, and video games

By , July 6, 2011 10:49 pm

Lesson of the day: Sometimes less is less.

Of course, finding that balance between too little and too much is the real trick…

Also, Steam is having a sale and I’m allowing myself one game. Trying to decide between between Left 4 Dead 1+2, Far Cry 1+2, Batman: Arkham Asylum, and GTA4…Thoughts?

The Spoon Theory

By , June 22, 2011 2:12 pm

If you haven’t come across it before, you should check out Christine Miserandino’s analogy of what it’s like to live with sickness or disability, The Spoon Theory. In it, she uses something physical – a certain number of spoons – to explain to her friend what it’s like living with a chronic illness, in her case lupus. At the start of every day, she has a certain number of ‘spoons’ (energy) and every action takes away a spoon. If she runs out of spoons before the day ends (which often happens) she’s left exhausted and potentially impacting her long-term health. From the essay:

I asked her [the friend] to count her spoons. She asked why, and I explained that when you are healthy you expect to have a never-ending supply of “spoons”. But when you have to now plan your day, you need to know exactly how many “spoons” you are starting with. It doesn’t guarantee that you might not lose some along the way, but at least it helps to know where you are starting. She counted out 12 spoons. She laughed and said she wanted more. I said no, and I knew right away that this little game would work, when she looked disappointed, and we hadn’t even started yet. I’ve wanted more “spoons” for years and haven’t found a way yet to get more, why should she? I also told her to always be conscious of how many she had, and not to drop them because she can never forget she has Lupus.

Very well-written and worth reading. Check it out.

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