Feministe’s “My Sluthood, Myself.”

By , July 28, 2010 9:41 pm

Earlier this week, Feministe had a post titled My Sluthood, Myself. Its author, Jaclyn, talks about how casual sexual encounters have become a healthy and positive part of her life:

But it didn’t really matter [if the encounters were worth repeating]. Because sluthood isn’t an action, it’s a state of mind.

I’m telling you this because sluthood saved me. Sluthood gave me the time and space to nurse a shattered heart. It gave me a place where I could exist in pieces, some of me craving touch, some of me still too tender to even expose to the light. Sluthood healed the part of me that felt my body and my desires were grotesque after two years in a libido-mismatched partnership. Now I felt hot, wanted, powerful. My desire and enthusiasm was an asset, not an unintended weapon. Even now, with more time passed, now, when I am actually ready for and wanting a more emotional connection, sluthood keeps me centered. It keeps me from confusing desire and affection with something deeper. It means I have another choice besides celibacy and settling. It means I won’t enter another committed relationship just to satisfy my basic need for sex and affection. It gives me more choices, it makes room for relationships to evolve organically, to take the shape they will before anyone defines them.

It’s quite a read, and I highly recommend it.

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